My New Year’s Resolution
2021 is here. I am doing something I haven’t done for a while: a new year's resolution!
Why I shouldn’t do this: new year’s resolution has never worked, for me or anyone. I dug up resolutions I made in colleges and earlier in my career, they read like forgotten aspirations turned into mocking documents: reduce poundage to 165 lbs.; make $50K this year; be able to dunk a basketball; get a girlfriend. Basically, I made wishes at the beginning of the year, and had no plan and motivation to carry it out.
Why I am doing one this year anyway: 1. I need it. 2020 sucked. I am making 2021 an amazing year. 2. I spent the past two years researching and making an app on habit building, and I understand human nature and myself much better now. I am using all the research and insights to build a resolution that not only works, but also is fun.
(By the way, if you are still reading this paragraph, or even past the word “new year's resolution”, ping me on Twitter, I’ll consider you my friend.)
A real new year's resolution that doesn’t read like a declaration of incompetency in February needs to be these:
Actionable – Most people focus on outputs, which are basically a daunting wish list. We have no direct control over the outputs. An achievable new year's resolution should be inputs: a list of daily habits that we can develop by taking actions every day.
Trackable – I’ve attempted many things since I was little. Some definitively failed: digging a hole through earth, graduating college in 2.5 years, and becoming the next Allen Iverson. And some succeeded: getting into dream graduate school, writing a book, and becoming a successful investor. All the successes had this in common: I meticulously tracked my progress on a regular basis, so I know where I stand and can improve. To make this new year resolution's successful, I will keep a spreadsheet on my progress, so I know where I am every day.
Screwupable – The first thing I know about myself: I screw up a lot. But the key in every success I had was to not let a screwup make me quit. To make my resolution achievable, I am going to give myself an overall target for the whole year, measured in hours/times/days. So if I miss a day or two, my focus will be to keep going, not to give up.
Fun – The second thing I know about myself: I need to have fun to keep going. If it’s a goal that’s not enjoyable, I will give up in no time. So my first step of having fun is to share my goals with you guys and put public pressure on myself. My second step: if I can achieve all ten of my goals, I will buy myself a big reward.
Got to have a reward
My reward: a Tesla Model X. OK, I have thought about many rewards, such as traveling to somewhere exotic or new pairs of MeUndies or something. But all these rewards are things I would have gotten anyway with or without the resolution. So I decided to do something that I would have never done otherwise. Personally, I don’t believe in spending a lot of money on a transportation tool. But if I can indeed achieve all these goals, it means I will have had an amazing year, and it would be worth every dollar I spend. Plus, I get a car!
What is my new year's resolution: developing ten success habits in 2021. Again, these are inputs, not outputs. I indeed have hefty output aspirations for my business and myself, but I know if I focus on developing these ten habits, the outputs will take care of themselves.
Habit 1: Creative work
2021 goal: 1,000 hours
In an interview, Jim Collins, the author who wrote legendary business books such as Good to Great, and Built to Last, mentioned that as an author, he needs to spend 3 hours a day on his creative work. He would then track them every day. If by the end of the year, he can achieve 1,000 hours, he would have fulfilled his goal as a creator.
They say “Talent borrows, genius steals.” I’m going to steal this one from Jim Collins (who is also a genius and probably stole it from someone else).
Habit 2: Get up at 5AM
2021 goal: 200 days
I have always been a night owl, but that’s about to change. The book 5 AM Club by Robin Sharma details how many successful people get up at 5AM to do the most critical work for the day. For me, this is related to goal #1. I have also found that the three hours from 5-8AM are amazing for creative works. No noise, no kids, no distraction. This habit perfectly overlaps with habit #1.
To make this successful, here is my plan: I will go to bed at 11PM for every night (nothing productive happens to me at night anyway). I will then get up at 5, go to a room without any connectable devices, and use my new age type-writer (a laptop which I stripped of its wifi card) to write for three hours. At 8AM, I will end the creative session and sleep for another two hours. I will later get up at 10AM for a second morning, and start out my new day. All in all, I will have full 8 hours of sleep.
There is an added psychological factor in my favor: getting up at 5AM is like punching-yourself-in-the-face hard. Once I’m up, my cognitive dissonance will kick in, and literally punch me in the face if I don’t use the time productively.
Habit 3: Set daily goals
2021 goal: 200 days
Based on my research, I found that having a list of goals for a day makes a dramatic impact on my productivity. Even if I don’t achieve all of them, having them by my side will remind me to work harder toward these goals. Yet, I have never developed the habit of setting these goals.
That’s about to change. For 200 out 365 days, I will set the goals for the next day. It will be the last thing I do before going to bed. Putting things on paper will also put my mind at ease about all the impending activities, and thus ensuring me to get up at 5AM.
Habit 4: Charge my phone outside
2021 goal: 300 nights
You know what’s the worst for you? Eating snacks at 11PM. You know what’s even worse than the worst? Scrolling your phone at 1AM. Not only it’s a colossal waste of time, the blue light and dopamine hits will also keep me awake. But you know what’s a great alternative to phone scrolling? Listening to audiobooks and podcasts. There is a reason listening to bedtime stories helps us sleep, while watching TV does the opposite. But to listen to audiobooks and podcasts, I will need my phone, which when I get my hand on, I will automatically start scrolling. What should I do?
Here is my plan, with the help of Airpods and Apple Watch: I will charge my iPhone in my bathroom, out of my reach in bed but within the range of Bluetooth. I will play the audiobook, and jump in bed with my Airpods, so I can listen while getting into sleep. What if I need to change the volume, pause or fast-forward? That’s where my Apple Watch comes in. It has a feature as a remote control for playing content on the phone, all while keeping my hands off the phone itself.
Technology can be bad and addictive. But if you use the good tech to combat bad tech, you can win. Think about Terminators: using T-800 to battle T-1000.
Habit 5: Listening to audiobooks
2021 goal: 300 hours
“Your mind is like a garden. If you don’t actively plant flowers and fruit trees, it will be taken over by wheat and dandelions.”
I don’t know who said this, could be either Aristotle or a random self-help guru. Either way I agree with it. The reason I had a mediocre 2020 was that I let all the unpleasant outside noise occupy my mind, especially the all-consuming news. In the end, the news network and social media made me feel sad/mad/helpless and profited off my emotions. To actively combat this, I need to let useful and inspiring thoughts into my mind to block out all the unpleasant garbage.
To do so, I will listen to thoughtfully curated audiobooks and podcasts, content created by people I admire and want to learn from. The good news is my app, Audible already has a usage tracking tool, which will help me to gauge my progress every day.
Moreover, this habit will overlap with habit 4. Double-dipping on habit-forming is where my joy is.
Habit 6: Having conversations with admired people
2021 goal: 200 conversations
This is a perfect sister habit of #5. The only difference is that I will get ideas and inspirations from a live person, instead of produced content.
The old saying is that you are the average of five people you hang out with the most. If that’s indeed the case, you can guide yourself toward positive directions by simply hanging out more with people who inspire you. Over the years, I can’t remember how many conversations I had with people would not only inspired me to take positive actions, but had profound impact on my career as well. They include Chris Guillebeau who inspired me to write a book, Tony Hsieh (rest in peace, my friend) who inspired me to start a tech company, and Michelle Jones who invited me to speak at TEDxMtHood, which was picked by TED and reproduced to be a real TED talk. Had I not made these outreaches to them, my life would have been very different now. Moreover, I have also helped a few folks achieving their own dreams through conversations, and their successes give me immense satisfaction.
For this year, I have compiled an ever-growing list of people I will continue to reach out to, whether they are past friends or future acquaintances.
Habit 7: Exercise
2021 goal: 100 hours
As an avid basketball player, the Covid-19 pandemic has been devastating for my exercise routine. Gone are the days when I could exercise and have fun at the same time at the local park. To replace it, I tried daily power walks and weekend hiking trips. I even picked up crabbing, which is in fact quite a workout.
However, I still haven’t found a way to raise my heart rate on a consistent basis. Again, as someone who have a hard time keeping up with something unless I’m having a good time, running just isn’t my thing. In the new year, I made two purchases: a basketball goal and a Peloton. I will also consistently track my exercise hours.
Habit 8: Spending time with kids
2021 goal: 500 hours
In 2020, I’ve learned that to be successful, I need to delegate. Tim Ferriss’ Four Hour Work Week rings especially true in 2020. That said, there is one role I can’t never delegate: being a father. I feel yesterday, I first held this bloody mess of a crying infant, today he’s a 5 feet tall dude telling me about Mark Rober and his investment portfolio.
I also know that soon enough, he will become an aloof teenager who rolls his eyes at everything I say. To cherish the time before he turns sour like bad milk, I want to spend more precious time with him. So this year, my goal is to spend 500 hours of quality time with my sons.
The good news is that I already spend 1 hour watching sports every day, and 3 hours hiking ever weekend with them. This habit overlaps with habit #6 too.
Habit 9: Spending time with parents
2021 goal: 100 hours
If someone asks me who my best friend is, I would say it’s my wife, then my father. We talk about politics, news, parenting, and being a good person. Both my parents have been such rocks in my life, and I owe a lot to them, much more than just genetically. My father just turned 70, and my mother is approaching it as well. I know I can’t take their presence and health for granted.
When they are staying with me, I want to take every opportunity to hang out with them, whether it’s doing late night walks or watching movies together.
Habit 10: Spending the day in emotional control
2021 goal: 300 days
I am not an angry person, but once in a while I would lose my temper. No matter the reason, it’s more than just me who suffer when it happens. More importantly, I’ve learned that most of these instances are completely avoidable if I simply shift my mindset before and during outbursts.
So this is my goal, for 300 out of 365 days, I want to go through the day without losing my temper once. I’ve done this before, with projects like 30 days of no anger. It’s amazing what paying attention and actively trying to control one’s emotions can do.
There you have it! This is my 2021 New Year's Resolution and my daily tracking spreadsheet. Will I get my Tesla? I don’t know, but I’m dying to find out.
PS. If you have made it this far, follow and ping me on Twitter. I will follow you back. You are a real friend!